Time for advice

There are times in your life which are harder than others. Looking back, my early thirties were particularly challenging. I was trying to build my career while we stretched ourselves for a new house and with young children to look after. Everything seemed a little hand to mouth and I used to worry myself sick about how I would cope. Here I am though, thirty years later with the storm well and truly behind me. That storm at least.

I feel, as I get older that perhaps another challenging time lies ahead as health issues rise to the fore. I’ll leave that until later. Much later hopefully.

When you are up against it people are always happy to give you advice. Opinion is cheap, advice is free and not always very helpful. Everyone is prepared to give it yet taking it is another thing altogether. How many of us actually follow our own advice? 

When you are in the middle of things, advice is probably the last thing you need. It can come across as patronising and critical. If someone offers you a way to sort  your life out then it is clear that they think you have lost it completely.

Having said all that There are two pieces of advice that I would give to my younger self. Firstly, there are a lot of people around you who are happy to help, usually who have been through it all and have learned their own lessons. If it is offered, take it. They will feel happier and so will you.

Secondly, you need to take a step back and think about those things that are definitely in your way, not the rocks in your stream but the great big boulders that are blocking your path. What are those things that, if only you could solve, would make your life so much better. Stop trying to solve everything, that is probably part of the problem. Pick the most important things, one or two at most and only things that you can actually influence. Then work out the path you need to follow to get them sorted. See the previous point for this as well.

This is what my own experience tells me. Whether my younger self would have taken this advice is another thing.

Time for advice

There are times in your life which are harder than others. Looking back, my early thirties were particularly challenging. I was trying to build my career while we stretched ourselves for a new house and with young children to look after. Everything seemed a little hand to mouth and I used to worry myself sick about how I would cope. Here I am though, thirty years later with the storm well and truly behind me. That storm at least.

I feel, as I get older that perhaps another challenging time lies ahead as health issues rise to the fore. I’ll leave that until later. Much later hopefully.

When you are up against it people are always happy to give you advice. Opinion is cheap, advice is free and not always very helpful. Everyone is prepared to give it yet taking it is another thing altogether. How many of us actually follow our own advice? 

When you are in the middle of things, advice is probably the last thing you need. It can come across as patronising and critical. If someone offers you a way to sort  your life out then it is clear that they think you have lost it completely.

Having said all that There are two pieces of advice that I would give to my younger self. Firstly, there are a lot of people around you who are happy to help, usually who have been through it all and have learned their own lessons. If it is offered, take it. They will feel happier and so will you.

Secondly, you need to take a step back and think about those things that are definitely in your way, not the rocks in your stream but the great big boulders that are blocking your path. What are those things that, if only you could solve, would make your life so much better. Stop trying to solve everything, that is probably part of the problem. Pick the most important things, one or two at most and only things that you can actually influence. Then work out the path you need to follow to get them sorted. See the previous point for this as well.

This is what my own experience tells me. Whether my younger self would have taken this advice is another thing.